+ The Return of the Fear

If you have been following me, you know how I am retaking my undergrad math classes to prep from a “too long” absence from that time in my life. I am doing this to prep for admission to grad school in math.

I miss the late nites with my peers knocking out Calc problems, chemistry lab reports and studying for a couple of the actuarial exams.

Dear old acquaintances have returned. I have two weeks before my Calc 3 midterm. I wouldn’t say that I am in a panic, but well...maybe close. It is when you are immediately able to intently focus while at the same time, warding off “fears” of running out of time.

+ It is Different This Time

This time, I am totally on my own. And that is okay. That is how I like life now for myself. No need for audiences or talking about what I am going to do, just what I am already doing. I am my own judge.

As Harrison Ford recently put forth in an interview, just do it for your own reasons, and more importantly Know thyself.

I have no time for spending time that I regret on useless activities for me. I have not time for shallow relationships or small talk. Life is simply too short. I have been told that I am intolerant of these characteristics in others. SPOT ON. I know what I value.

So, back to “my time” right now. Superb and Grumpy and I know who I am. Returning to the place where I was my happiest.

Most people don’t know that path or are, I think, usually not willing to do the work and confront the IDEA of knowing who they are what they want.

So now most evenings, you will find me in a coffee shop with students or after having worked with them, cranking on Calc 3 and documenting the musings of my soul.